Merchant of Death (Admin)
The staff and support groups of HKPro would like to wish each of you who will be celebrating the Thanksgiving holiday bountiful greetings. Some of you will be getting off of work a bot early and some of you are already off (some of you have been off for quite a long time!). Take an extra bit of care over the next few days! May your tables be full of warmth and love, food and beverage, and a general spirit of... Thanksgiving! A couple of holiday tips:
- If you are frying a turkey this year, please make certain that the bird is completely thawed before you drop it in the boiling oil. Really. Don't be a YouTube sensation.
- If you are drinking adult beverages, know your limits. Better to pass out in front of the game and be safe than to play drunken bumper cars on the roads.
- For some reason, folks like to shoot off guns into the sky on holidays. This is stupid. Don't be that guy. Bullets have to come down. Even an HK is not capable of making a projo achieve escape velocity.
- If you can do something nice for somebody, do it! You don't have to do full blown volunteer work, but just one kind gesture is all it takes to spread some warmth.
- In most family get togethers it is not real until somebody gets offended and a scene ensues. It's common sense to stay away from the discussion topics of politics, religion, sports rivalries, relatives personal business, etc. It's also pretty much impossible to avoid those topics. Since it is imprudent to lace the turkey stuffing with Xanax, at least try to avoid confrontation.
- Cranberry sauce is not a gelatin mold and should not come from a can.
- You absolutely do not have enough beer/wine/Captain & Coke/whisky, etc. Go buy more today.
- You absolutely do have something to be thankful for. I know it.